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khushnoormann

Everything I love & everything you will love

The boy who takes it all on his shoulders.

Why? I’m a boy, is that why? I’ve got feelings. I admit I’m strong enough physically. I can fight, fight for my parents’ respect, for the girl I love, for what is right. But who has ever, fought for me. I bear all the responsibilities, why? Why do people prefer a 5-year old boy in their family than a 25-year old girl? Why has the world made my image so strong that I’m afraid to show my weaker and more innocent side. I’m always regarded as a violent stud or a boring nerd. Just why is that? My parents have always waited for me to grow older only to pass on their responsibilities to me. The girl I love the most in this world, always needs my attention, but fails to give me the same, always! Oh, I forgot, I’m a man, a gentle-man indeed! How could I be weak at heart? I have a stone-heart.

I’m always there to protect my family, my love, my friends. Who’s there for me? Not a single person I can cry in the lap of. Well, crying is just a huge, dirty, black spot on my so-called masculine ego. To people, not crying means no heartbreaks, no depressions, no problems, and no pains! My only companion in the sharing of a sea feelings-the underneath of my blanket. Nonetheless, I have to go with it, and live (survive) with it!

A strange you

You will choose me
Over and over
You will try getting far
But you will lose
You will come back to the same place.

You will try,
Try hating me
But my thoughts will be etched forever
In your heart and soul
All pleasures will come to a standstill
When you will fall for me.

You seek others when I seek you
I say to myself,
Don’t worry
These girls aren’t forever
But then
So aren’t you.

This thought threatens me
Makes me a live cadaver
And a walking dead
Tell me not I didn’t love you
For it was you who was blind to this feel.

The girl wrapped in black

She wasn’t a bad girl. She was the modest, the most innocent one. Yet she was forced to be bad, or, did she desire to be bad? She was one of those GIRLS who never liked to talk much, who was afraid to catch up with people, to make friends. But once she made friends, she’d lock them in her heart. She would lock in her heart, just, everyone who cared for her and that was where she lost because not everyone cared with a whole heart!

A girl of 18, free to do anything she wishes, but still not free. She has a sea of feelings within her, but she’s afraid she’ll spill it. She argues that she is right, but deep inside, she sees the culprit in herself, too.

The world showed her, that she was way too far from the world of beauty and fashion and socialising, then in a frustration of self-criticism, she became beautiful for the boys, the people, she socialised with people which consequently meant that she ruined herself. She lost herself. She was no more ‘herself’. Her soul fed no more on her inner voice, but on the voices of the people saying you’re beautiful, you’re sweet, or, you’re rude, you’re ugly, you’re a liar, you’re a BITCH!

She cried for days, sobbed quietly. Little did she know what she had to do and what not! She was a culprit in herself, because people broke her, and she let them! They bruised her soul when they left. She showed them a beautiful face, a mask, actually, behind which a girl was dying slowly. She was getting her ‘karma’ for not listening to hersef at times, for considering ‘others’ important than her own self and her own soul and she was punished for being ‘someone else’. A change took place, she is now no more a sensitive, good-to-ruin girl. She is strong, content and brusque. She is her own queen. She does what she wants and doesn’t stress over what people have to say. She made a stone out of her heart!

She was happier, until, the day she realised that, in doing so, she lost the ones who cared for her, who were there at bad times. She felt guilty just like a murderer. She murdered the emotions of people who loved her, just like the people did to her before. She wasn’t able to go back to being sensitive again. She couldn’t. She wouldn’t go back. She won’t think about it again, ever!

But in her heart of hearts, she knew she ruined herself just to be someone that people wished her to be. She locked away her emotions wrapped them in the darkness, in the black, and never looked back just as she could never get her ‘self’ back. Now, wherever she would go, she’d take with herself two emotional selves but never a girl that she USED TO BE!

But…

Why, he doesn’t care,
But I need him.

Why, he’s called you bad names,
But he doesn’t mean it.

Why, he leaves you crying,
But his tears are the most painful.

Why, he mistreats you,
But I don’t mind.

Why, he breaks up with you,
But I can’t break his heart.

Why, he says he doesn’t love you,
But he does.

Why, you make him so important,
Because everyone’s life is important and so is he to me.

He loved, loves, will love me.

I can’t find another way
I just wanna stay.
With you
All night long.
Listening to my favourite song
Your heart that beats.
The happiness that it leads
I want it everyday
When in your arms I lay.
I curse that day
When you’re not with me.
Holding me like a child
Those foolish things you say.
I knew you love me
I know you love me
I know you’ll love me
There’s no end to it
No stop to it.
Just like a stone rolling without gravity
You roll in my mind till infinity.

It’s not love by which I know you
It’s you by which I know love.

5 things that girls love but guys hate about the Twilight series.

Twilight series is one of the most fascinating fiction novel and movie parts, and literally, the most time-wasting, bullshit love-fiction story only for the boys. But girls do love it!

Here are the 5 things that girls love about twilight series but guys DON’T :-

#1. Girls- “Oh those romantic scenes, those kisses, those passionate looks. I wish I was Bella.”
Guys- “Wtf! That bitch is dating two animals. Can’t she find a human for herself. I’d kill my girlfriend if she was Bella.”

#2. Girls- “I’ll plan a weekend stay with my boyfriend at my home and we’ll watch the first two parts together. Oh he’ll be so romantic after watching those parts!”
Guys- “Now this shit comes along my way. Is she crazy? How will I manage to watch that movie again? It’s actually better to get drunk and tell her that I’m sick with alcohol poisoning.”

#3. Girls- “Bella’s having two dates at one time. She can choose anyone she loves more. I guess I also need to have an option in case my boyfriend turns dumb.
Guys- “How can she even think of loving two persons at a time? That’s pretty ridiculous. These movie makers and writers are so dumb that they’re urging girls to go out and find another spare piece boyfriend to be passionate with and relate their story to twilight.”

#4. Girls’ “Oh! Edward is so white and so cute. How can he be so charming?! I have a crush on him since I watched the movie for the first time. His eyes are so beautiful!
Guys- “That Edward guy is a really screwed character. I mean, he must’ve used a 100 bottles of foundation in all the series. He can be white, but not that much. I hate when people show these kinds of kinky things in the movies. Plus, he’s made to wear those ghastly lens in which he looks “hot” to the girls. I mean, I also should go out and buy a pair of gray lenses, would I look hot? Never.”

#5. Girls- “I loved the concept of the movie. This romantic fiction series is my favourite and I’ll nevet get tired of watching it again and again.
Guys- “I never understood the basic concept or meaning of these movies and that’s why I don’t like it. In fact, even the action performed is too much overacting. I hate this thing about twilight.

This is a list based on my face-to face survey with over 60 people. Moreover, this is only a humor-creating list. Nothing personal, nothing serious honey. 🙂

Abstract love

I know it all. To you, I’m just a simple girl who says I love you. I’m just the one who cries over the things you say to me. I’m the one who never wants to leave your side. I’m the one who wants to see you happy all the time. I’m the one who scolds you for your own good. I’m the one who fights with you just to let you know that I care. I’m the one who, when says bad to you, returns the double to myself. I’m the one who waits for you every other day. I’m the one who gets happier when you kiss me and hold my hand. I’m the one for whom you are the most handsome boy in the whole goddamn world. I’m the one who ignores your imperfections and expect the same. I’m the one who loves to see you laughing. I’m the one who can be unreasonably funny with you and feel no shame. I’m the one who has heartaches when you don’t trust me. I’m the one who gets humiliated by you and still remain the same. I’m the one who takes a look at you and says he’s just mine forever. I’m the one who will love you till time stops and after that. I’m the one who will cry, but will surely be happy after seeing you. I’m the one who cannot survive a breath without you.
But to you, I’m just a simple girl crying for the sake of showing you and I’m just a simple girl with nothing that you can love.

A Letter To My Mom

Yes, my mom. A little letter to my mom and every other mom who loves her child more than anything else.

She smiled at me, with tears in her eyes.
“Lord! I can’t be more happy than how happy I am today because today’s the day you are settled in your life. You are happy today, you are successful today. You don’t know what it means to me, darling.”  She didn’t say it yet but she will, after I’d have settled in my life. Then, she’ll relieve all her stresses and worries about me.

Subject: Mom, please stay with me forever.

Mom, all my life, what you did for me, I know I can’t pay you back all that worth. But I know one thing, I’ll love you till my last breath and after.

You loved me, scolded me, slapped me, kept my secrets, made me understand things, kept telling me about wrongs and rights of life, laughed with me too hard, sacrificed your comforts for mine, gave me the best level of knowledge that a mother can give, cried for me, cared for me, got worried if I got hurt, and loved me even if I was the bad one.

You were always there when no one else was. When everyone betrayed me and said bad to me, you were there to love me unconditionally and still make me happy.

You’re the most beautiful woman I know. I know sometimes, even I hurt you and don’t realise it. Forgive me for each mistake I made, whether big or small. Promise me that you’ll always love me like this for the life ahead becauseI really can’t live without you.
Love,
Your daughter,
KHUSH

Just love your parents and you’ll never ever fail in life. Your mom is your everything and your dad is your superhero. You can’t unlove them, ever. But do yourself and your parents a favour, achieve something in your life. They’ll have no space left for regrets and you’ll see their happy faces for the life coming ahead of you.

A last quote for every mother from her child,” I don’t know where the infinity goes, but please hold my hand tight till it ends.”

Poverty- what it really means?

Poverty, a word and a state of people, which is often mistaken as the pitiable state of some people who can’t afford food, shelter, clothing and money. But in true words, it also means that it’s a state in which a person is deprived of some comfort or happiness that may either be due to his own fault or no one’s.

Some people are so poor that they can’t just afford a piece of cloth or a slice of bread, but sometimes, these maybe just  the same people who know a lot about life, about saving money and about being non-demanding. On the other side, some people are really rich that even if they live in a bungalow and have nice BMW, Lamborgini and Land Rover like cars, they’d still crave for more.

Poorness or richness does not lie with what car you own what clothes who wear or where you go, but it lies with the fact that how much open-minded and open-hearted you are. I guess your heart never said to you that bring me a Mini Cooper and give me a ride in it, and after that I’ll behave good.

General people treat poor people as they’re not humans, but, on the contrary, the way that those people behave doesn’t look like human at all, atleast to me. People have so much black hearts that you just can’t imagine what they do.

Even if someone is extremely beautiful from the face, if he’s selfish then I must say he’s pretty poor. If someone is already saving money with bare hands, and still helps someone out, then trust me, he is as richer as he gets with this personality.

At last, just the remembering quotations,” You are poor if you’re selfish, cruel, greedy, rude, arrogant and a sucker in love. You are rich if you’re helpful, affectionate, kind, generous, happy and a believer in love”.

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